So gents, this is the grand moment you’ve been waiting for ever since you had your first playground crush. The world changing secret to winning the heart of a woman and the key is *cue drumroll* … SPEND TIME WITH HER! Get to know her as a person. Listen to what she has to say and remember at least a little bit of it. DO NOT blow her off because you’re too busy checking her out. Nothing will shut down your chances with an actual lady quicker than ignoring who we are for what we look like. And nothing will raise your chances of finding a way into our hearts better than spending time with us and getting to know us as people. Spontaneous “wanna go to the park” things are something I’m personally a sucker for, but get to know the girl you’ve got your eye on and it really isn’t that hard to figure out what she’d like whether it’s a hike or a cup of coffee at a trendy coffeehouse.
It’s seriously not that hard.
And if you find yourself stuck in the “friendzone” ask yourself a couple questions.
- Have I given this enough time? You can’t plead the “friendzone card” after only knowing a girl for six weeks, if stuck is somewhere you feel with the person after six months, that’s a little more acceptable. Some girls don’t open up as quickly as others or figure out just how we feel like other girls. One size does not fit all.
- Can I be satisfied with just friendship with this girl? (if you think you’re just going to miserably pine every time you see her and your feelings will ruin the friendship the answer is no. And you should probably try to distance yourself.
Bear in mind no one is obliged to return your affections, whether genuine or shallow. And to add to that, that does not mean that girls don’t understand rejection. Trust me, we do, we still think about the time that the boy we liked in middle school (I could name him) rejected our feelings and refused to talk to us on the playground afterwords. So keep previous damage in mind. And further, we are not all heartless bitches who delight in breaking boys’ hearts, maybe some, but not all of us, so try not to judge us by the standard of those that came before, or worse, those that your friends have had to deal with. (Believe me, if I judged men by the example of those my friends dated, I wouldn’t speak to boys to save my life!)
So basically, invest in a girl and get to know her. Evaluate how friendzoned is friendzone. And don’t judge a girl on previous experiences or the experiences of your friends.